On leaving

It's harder this time. 

It feels harder. 

Maybe just let our lives be an example of what NOT to do when you're a missionary. Don't choose to live in SUCH a remote area. Don't adopt internationally. Don't be in America during a pandemic. Don't get placed on your host countries' blacklist. Don't lose your visas when you leave. Don't buy a fixer upper during furlough. Don't travel DURING said pandemic. Just don't. 

Of course, no one is saying that because it's ridiculous. We don't live in a constant state of regret because the things we've gained and have now BECAUSE of all of those things are even greater than the losses. In our minds, we've lost all momentum in language learning, our kids have missed their jungle home, and we've put on those extra lbs from the extra time in the states (ok, just me cause Sam just runs 15 miles after eating a burger and he's fine). But really, look at all that we have gained in spite of it. Those things outweigh the negative by far.

One of those things is the relationships we've built while here, especially with family. And that's why it's harder this time. Our kids have had so much time with their cousins and aunts, uncle's and grandparents. They've made friends. They've made sweet memories. 

It's not easy leaving. But as the ones leaving, we are looking forward to what's ahead. And that makes the sting a little easier to bear. For our family it's different. Have you heard the saying that it's harder being the ones staying than the ones leaving? For them, it's loss. And yet they do it with an abundance of grace and support for what we are doing. They hate it and love it at the same time. 

We will never take for granted that this is a sacrifice for them too. 

It's harder this time. Because we've had so much time to do normal life with them. No one really wants that to change. But change is ahead. And God's grace doesn't go with one and leave the other. It's ever present with all of His children and knows no bounds. 

So when you think of us as we leave, remember our families as well. 

May we all feel His peace and grace as we spend our last week together, knowing what's ahead and trusting Him to be our strength.